“I’m trying to understand my parents’ weaknesses so I can forgive them and move on.”

When I was growing up, things got really bad at my house. My parents would have these parties that went on for days. There was lots of yelling and drinking. People would get in fights because they were angry or jealous about the stupidest things. Women beat up women, and men would hit their girlfriends.

My sister and brother and I would stay in our room together for as much as we could because you just never knew what you were going to see if you went out into the rest of the house. We’d hang a blanket in front of the door, partly because it was cold and it helped to keep the room a little warmer, but also because it felt safer. We used to make up stories about how the blanket was this protective force field.

Then, when my sister was older, she started going to the parties too. I don’t know why. My sister is still really messed up today and I worry about her.

My brother and I started staying up really late and sleeping during the day, because it was safer. There were times that someone would be really drunk and come into our room and lie down with us. They’d pretend they didn’t know what they were doing, like it was a dream, but it was real all right.

When we kept falling asleep in school my parents called my grandparents and we went to live with them so my parents wouldn’t get in trouble. We still see them sometimes but mostly we’re with my grandparents, so that’s good. They tell me stories about when my dad was young and it helps me not to be as angry with him as I was before.